by Mike Davenport, CoachingSportsToday.com
Your boss is going to fire you.
He doesn’t care if you’ve won the conference 50 times, are Coach Of The Year, or how many Olympic golds you have around your neck. Understand this truth — you will get fired.
We all will get fired.
Welcome to coaching sports.
Daddy, Why Did Coach Jonnie Get Fired?
There is a huge list of reasons why coaches get fired. The real reason — it was time for Coach Jonnie to go. It’s that simple.
The moment you start a coaching job, the clock begins ticking.
And at some point, your time will run out. It does for all coaches, and it will for you.
My Truth
I’ve been fired. It sucked. Painful. Once I cried.
But it was the best thing for me.
Honestly, I hate it when people say that — “it was the best thing for me.” But in my case it was true. In most cases it is true.
See, I needed to move on. Wouldn’t do it of my own accord, so my boss helped me to the door and locked it behind me. Click.
You Have Choices
Getting fired is a whirly, twirly time. When it happens to you (note – when, not if) what are you going to do with the mess swirling around in your brain?
Processing your firing before hand helps. I call it pre-firing. So let’s do a wee bit of pre-firing processing, shall we:
1) “Is today my day?”
Maybe. Always be prepared to be fired. Don’t coach scared, but realize getting canned is part of the job. What would you say, right now, if you were called into the boss’s office, he closes the door, then says, “You’re fired“? Process this before hand, so at that moment when it does happen (again WHEN not IF) you can take a deep breath and say something cool like Cool Hand Luke would, then grab your stuff, and move on.
2) WHAT!! YOU CANT FIRE ME!!
When you get fired receive it with class. Be THAT COACH who is cool and calm, not THAT COACH who has to be escorted off the premises by the bouncer. Don’t burn bridges, even though you think fire purifies, it just leaves a mess afterwards. And don’t get emotional then. Save that for later, and there will be a later.
3) “But, but, they CAN’T fire me.”
Sure they can. They just did. Even if you have a contract — you’re fireable. It might cost them, but they can do it. Everyone is fireable — Steve Jobs and Richard Nixon were fireable. So was:
4) “Crud … sniff …they really did me wrong.”
Read #2. Then if you believe you were wronged, figure out how a reasonable and prudent person would preceded. I would first start with Human Resources/Personnel to get their view on things. If that’s a stone wall, next step — consult with your lawyer. A short sit-down with a wise attorney will cost you money, but the advice/guidance should be well worth it.
Then get over it as professionally as you can, that will have an impact on getting your next gig. And protect yourself.
5) “I’m mad as hell and I’m gonna let the World know it.”
For the sake of all things sane … stay away from social media — for two reasons. First, whatever you write/say can be used against you and will NOT help your cause or make you look the least bit appealing to your next boss (regardless of whether you stay in coaching or not). Second, knowing what is being said by others won’t help, especially those who agree with you being let go.
6) “This topic is bumming me out. I don’t want to talk about this now.”
I gotcha. No worries mate. Come back when you’re ready.
7) “Where will I go if … when … I get fired?”
Always have another gig in your back pocket. That was the advice my thesis advisor had for me. He told me that “in case this whole doctorate thing doesn’t work out for you.” Six months later HE was fired. But he landed on his feet within a week because he pulled that gig out of his back pocket, having already gone through the pre-firing process.
8) “I hate my current coaching gig!”
If you hate it, chances are the feeling is mutual. Consider firing them first.
9) “I didn’t get fired, I quit.”
Just words, you fired yourself. Congrats, now what’s the next step?
10) “The coach taking my place will make me look bad!”
Don’t look back — look ahead. Most times a new coach does worse than the old coach. Looking back just hurts your neck and you’ll walk into an open manhole because you’re not looking ahead. And if the coach does better then send him/her a sincere handwritten note saying congrats. Again, read #2
11) “They said they were letting me go because, ‘we want to go in a new direction'”.
That’s code for “you seriously burnt a relationship somewhere.”
12) “Why oh why was I fired?”
When you are fired, find out why, and build on that. For instance, if your boss was an idiot, then learn not to take a job working for an idiot. What else can you learn from it?
What did you do wrong? Maybe nothing. Might be a dysfunctional group. Boss might be jealous, or his nephew wanted your job. Or you DID do something wrong. Competition is a horrible way to make a living because everyone gets crazy, and the more competitive the situation, the more the crazy happens. Learn, apologize if you need to, and move on.
13) “Argh, this really sucks!”
Yes. Yes it does. But take one small step forward at a time. Listen to what you would have told your athletes after a loss. It’s harder to pick yourself up, I know, but take small steps and try.
14) “You don’t get it, this really sucks.”
No, I do get it, and it might be time for positive-help. Close supportive friends might be just what you need. Or a sit down with a counsellor. Stay away from diss-sessions with your buddy who was also fired. A case of beer with two guys crying into is a waste of time, tears, and beer.
15) “Now what do I do?”
Reinvent yourself. Read this.
16) “What do I do next!”
What do you want to do? Keep coaching? Really? Maybe. First, do the step above.
17) “Why do people look at me funny?”
Because they:
- fear you
- don’t want to be associated with you
- envy you
- got you fired
Ignore them. They’ve got their own issues.
18) “What will I tell my kids/wife/mother/Facebook stalkers?”
Tell them the truth. They won’t understand. Heck, no one ever understand coaches. Most of the time we don’t understand ourselves. So give them the truth, and let them shuffle through it. And tell the little kids it’s for the best. One friend told his kids, “It’s time for a new adventure.” He was right.
19) “How do I pay my bills?”
Go make money, that’s how. If you’re waiting for the next coaching gig, do something to make money in the meantime. Don’t lay around the couch, hands in pants, playing BattleFront. Go!
20) “Jeez, Jane just got fired. I don’t know what to do.”
You’re a human, be a human. There’s that Golden Rule thing right. Remember that. Thirty years ago a coach down the hall was fired. I didn’t know what I said, but I said something to him as soon as I found out. I saw him last year. We did the man-hug thing, chatted for a while, and he said, “A while ago, I had a tough time. You were nice. I appreciated and remembered that. I’ve tried to do the same.” Karma points.
Action You Can (and should) Take
I know there’s a lot of layers to getting fired, and it’s a big thing. But’s it’s part of coaching. A real part of coaching. Go through the steps above once per year, and you might be better prepared for it when it happens to you.
* * *
- My new book is up on Amazon. It’s about the simple truths of coaching sports. I hope you have a chance to read it. Here’s what a few have said:
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“Davenport does a really good job of identifying the dark side of coaching that doesn’t get discussed very much.”
“The 3 Sinister Truths of Coaching Sports Today is a quick and productive read that is applicable to coaches at any level.”
You can claim your copy here.
PPS: And my coaching survey can be found right here. It takes 3 minutes to complete and will help me better help you. Dozens and dozens of coaches have taken it. You?
-Mike